About me, the author: I've had some professional therapy and  counseling since 1983. I began to read books the first psychiatrist had in his office, (authored by William Glasser)  and that triggered an ongoing pattern of reading nonfictional books on topics that were all  new  to me. I had neurological tests done in 1984 at Harborview in Seattle, and was seeing Dr. Robert Waters, a psychiatrist who ordered them.

 The neurological test was an all day test. I was blindfolded in several tests and had to perform simple tasks with each hand. Other tests required doing something as rapidly as I could with each hand. Some required looking at a  kind of television screen (this was in 1984 keep that in mind) and interpreting what I saw. That one  took some time, because I couldn't do what I was supposed to do although I tried and my head felt like it would burst. Overall the tests seemed to be similar to intelligence tests I'd particularly enjoyed when I   was a student in grade school, finding  patterns, identifying sequences etc. By that point in time I'd become convinced I'd had brain damage as a  result of an accident. I'd also been  told I had 'severe menopausal syndrome' after a complete hysterectomy. I was not my usual 'normal' and I was feeling very uncomfortable in my body.  My  mind was an endless belt of  thought about an unusual dream I'd had. I could not sleep because of the 'non-stop thinking'.  I rarely dream and this dream was short, extremely vivid and it initiated the never ending stream of thought about one person in the dream., only one person that I barely knew, a square dance caller. In therapy, thought about the dream was my first complaint, but in sessions that was, to my surprise ignored. Nobody ever asked about the  dream or the stream of thought it produced.

That was a fact that I didn't talk about to the professionals because I didn't notice that I could not initiate conversations or get answers to questions I had wanted to ask until I had a feeling that made me feel  stifled, prevented, blocked after a session. Which was exactly how I felt about the square dance caller in the dream! I had a strong and strange to me need to get to know him and for some reason I couldn't talk to him except in the most trivial banal way.

 I  noticed as time passed and much happened in my life that I could not initiate and maintain a conversation with my husband either.

The results of the tests were interpreted to me and I was  told that my handedness had changed. My left hand was dominate now, I've been right handed all my life and even then I wrote normally with my right hand. But my left hand had rapidly done tests that my right hand struggled to do, or could not do. My I.Q was high but I was also told that I did not have the problem solving skills that are expected of that level. I remember hearing Dr. Waters say that and it seemed I'd heard the same words before sometime in my life.

 It was probably a deja vu event, which I will define as hearing something or seeing something that is already present in some form in my thought that is experienced  from the exterior world. The effect was new to me, I felt dizzy when it happened and couldn't see any explanation for the loss of balance that made me feel like I stood on a floor   that was like Jello.

The thought in my mind began to meet its content outside of my body more frequently and I felt increasingly confused.  But I also  felt watched, controlled as time passed and events happened to people I knew  who seemed to talk to my thought.  Which of course was confusing until I had begun to sense a purposefulness at work in this strangeness Also I had managed to buy a Datsun B210 station wagon that was already tabbed with a plate that made me laugh when I first glanced at it:  ETW.  I laughed because my mind spontaneously  generated .Extra Terrestrial Woman from ETW  and I had begun to feel like i was a space vehicle manipulated from afar. I knew my unspoken thought was being related to and that seemed impossible. They could not really read my thought (several kinds,  mostly far below speech and even  distant from my own conscious perception..  That became obvious over a span of about 6 years.

An enormous bundle of content bloomed in my mind in July 1984 which I eventually  discovered before I realized the depths  in my mind was  visible  content but not close to verbal speech!  I had to discover and recognize vast spaces and galaxies in my own mind.  That happened almost a year after the Event happened. I had worked for Boeing almost 6 months when as I walked to my car after my shift ended, I heard my self say: "It was a message.  I got a message."  Soon after that day my hands typed the part that contained the message, I printed a copy,, didn't read it then and was not curious about such a strange thing!